Something which gives you a superior feeling, makes you look like a weird person but still you wouldn’t get that out of you?
No, it is not asking other people’s marks.
It is Ego
Ego, oh boy. How familiar are we with it?
It’s just like beards. Doesn’t go unless you try removing it.
Often I’ve seen people who say “Hey. Don’t hurt my ego”. Just to let you know, it is not something to be proud of.
What is Ego?
The ego is an identity of our construction, an identity which is false. If we take all our assumptions about ourself – assumptions about our personality, talent and abilities – we can see our ego shaped into a person. Ego is not something that you got because you did something great or you became rich or famous or anything. There are many definitions to it. We’re not going there. Whichever way, it is bad for you.
It’s like your shadow. If the sun is up there, you have a little shadow. If the sun is down there, you have a long shadow. Whichever way the situation demands, that is the kind of shadow you have. Your ego should also be much similar to this.
I’ll talk about “How ego can ruin things” in two places
Do things that feed your soul, not your ego and you will be happy
1.Ego in Friendship
I would be surprised if any friendship builds up more stronger because of ego.
“I’m not going to text first”.
“Let him/her make the move”.
“I’m not talking. Even if I do, I’ll talk with an egoistic face”.
What are you getting out of this? False satisfaction and a sense of superiority?
Let me give you reality check. It doesn’t get you anything. You are eventually the person in loss. What harm do you incur if you let go off things and get back to normalcy? Looks too clingy? IT IS NOT! Just try making the first move, it’ll do wonders.
Remember this. If you’re very serious about your relation with someone, you wouldn’t consider ego as a deciding factor of your relation. Which relation goes smoothly without any problems? If it goes smoothly without any problems, then it is not reality. You must be in some fantasy world of yours own.
And to the people who say “Wouldn’t go down my ego for anyone”
WAKE UP! There’s a life outside your ego where you get the best lessons.
You may say it’s self respect. There is a thin line between Self Respect and Ego. We often tend to mistake that.
Self respect is your personality. The way you present yourself to the world. The consistency of your behaviour pattern. All these tell the world who you are. Respect has to be earned and shouldn’t be asked. If you bring respect and ego in one plate and thinks is right then buddy, ‘Tum shayad galat ho’ (You may be wrong).
2.Ego in Sports
In sports, I’ve seen two kinds of people.
One. Who is happy for someone else’s achievements and try learning something out of it. Second. Who get frustrated when someone achieves something and just give up.
I used to be of the second type who changed to the first type. It was quite tough to accept somethings but I had to come over it. Now, I don’t bother about anybody in my game. I do my own training and try my level best to improve.
I’ve seen people who have been successful in their field of play being so egoistic that the person wouldn’t talk to anyone who would have a lesser game than them. The person would just come and blow their trumpets in front of them just to feel superior.
It’s all going to be no use. Who knows, one day those players may come up defeat you in the game?
The best example would be Virat Kohli. He has no limits. He doesn’t stop after achieving something. His zest to improve more and more has helped him raise the bar high. He tries to get perfection beyond perfection. That’s how we all should be.
When you start feeling as if you’ve done something great, that is where ego kicks in. You start underestimating people. You don’t wish to improve anymore because you feel you’re the best. That’s not the right attitude. No matter how great you become, don’t quit practicing. Don’t quit improving. Don’t bring ego in your passion.
And to those who get these egoistic taunts from others, I know it feels bad. You may feel like giving up. Do not. Do not give them the satisfaction of seeing you not feeling good. Work hard in silence. Let your success be the revenge.
There is a Sanskrit word called “Ahankaara“.
“Ahan” means being selfish or the sense of ‘I’.
“Kaara” means a maker or a doer.
Basically it means that a person has a lot of Ahankaaram i.e. A person does a lot of “mine-ness” or makes everything to him/her.
We have another term called as “Vairagya“.
“Raga” means colour.
“Vai” means beyond.
It means beyond colour, you’ve become transparent. If you’re in a place, you become a part of that but nothing should stick to you. That is how you are in a state of Vairag. We need to be Vairagya in life. Be a part of everything but everything shouldn’t stick to you.
Our existence becomes meaningful when many lives get benefited from it. Lives don’t get benefited with our ego. Expression of ego to convey a message is your strength. Expression of uncontrollable ego as your nature is your weakness. It is something you should be aware of. Analyse your expressions. Be aware.
Ego is just like dust in the eyes. Without clearing the dust, we can’t see anything clearly. So clear the ego and see the world.
Let’s all keep our ego aside achieve success in life together !