Isn’t that a common occurrence? We deal with it in some form or other. And it’s not good when it comes up.
It might be jealousy when someone from your same field succeeds or when someone close to you gets close to someone else or when someone whom you dislike gets all the praises or when others are having more fun than you.
I do admit that I get jealous and I don’t like myself when I get jealous. So what do I do about it? I acknowledge it and analyse why I got jealous.
“The thermometer of success is merely the jealousy of the malcontents” – Salvador Dal
Why do we get jealous? What do we get out of it?
Jealousy is just an emotional response or reaction to a past incident. It is something which erupts when we see something we don’t like and it’s not even our fault. Our past haunts us in the present and it becomes incredibly difficult to come over it. We fear that the incident may repeat again and out of fear, a term called “jealousy” comes out of us. But, if we want we can overcome it.
Why do we get jealous?
The answer would be that others doing are something good or having more fun than you, makes them superior and you feel inferior. No, that’s wrong.
It’s all based on your thinking. If they’re working hard, why to get jealous about it ? Even if somebody walks away with the cake in spite of you putting your best foot forward, don’t get disturbed by the feeling of jealousy. Instead, take it to your head and get motivated by that and start working !
There are just 3 reasons why people get jealous
1. When they can’t reach your level.
2. When they don’t have what you have.
3. When they try to copy you but can’t succeed in that.
Emotional jealousy and envy are different from the jealousy we’re talking about. Often people get confused between envy and jealousy. Envy has a different meaning and let’s not go there now.
“Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness, of hatred, of jealous, and, most easily of all, the gate of fear.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr
After all my experiences with jealousy, somethings stayed back. In a better way, some of the consequences of jealousy are as follows :
Fright – You fear that you wouldn’t get what you desire or you would lose something you have.
Competitive spirit – You become aggressive when it comes to outstanding others.
“Opionating” or Criticising – Demeaning or undermining someone else’s success becomes a satisfying goal for you.
Comparison – Starting to measure your success against others and giving yourself a superior or inferior reaction.
Getting angry, having lack of peace, feeling insecure adds more to the consequences of jealousy.
But hey! Let’s get to the good part of it. There’s a hidden power in jealousy!
I have realised that there is some hidden power in jealousy, if we optimise it in a proper way. I know I sound completely unorthodox, considering the fact that the word is used negatively. But try spending some time thinking about it, go through the above points. It’s genuinely okay to get jealous. It’s human. Learn to embrace it rather than using it as a weapon of self destruction. Explore options to convert it into your favour.
When you see someone doing better than you, use that as a reality check and start doing productive work. Just because they’re doing better than you or succeeded in whatever they’re doing, don’t hate them for that. Praise them, appreciate their efforts because you don’t know what all they would’ve gone through to get to what they are in life today.
Basically, jealousy is a form of comparison between two things. What you want and what you don’t have. But if we work towards what we don’t have, instead of giving opinions about others and their work, our life would be much better than we think it’d be. Remember this, this is your life. No one except you can mould it. Your work defines you and not your talks. If talking was the key to success, so many of us would be something great by now!
I believe that : “If we keep our jealousy aside and work as individuals, we can surely see growth as individuals and growth as a country”
Looking forward to a Non-Jealous-Yet-A-Successful-Future!